6 posts tagged “movies”
So i have done next to nothing after my previous post. I suck.
What have i been doing with my time? Besides fighting the usual unspoken war with The Wife? Watching "Sleepless in Seattle" of course. I am a sucker for romantic movies altho it isn't something i advertise, as this does not enhance the manly man image i try to cultivate. Fortunately i am aware of this sentimental streak running deep and wide in my temperment. It is also fortunate that there are so few actually romantic movies to turn me to mush. There are even a few movies, rare and unusual movies, that are such a cut above the rest that i can't even watch because of how they connect to some kind of deep brokeness within me. Edward Sissorhands and 50 First Dates are at the top of that list of exactly that type of movie. For some reason, Winnona Ryder at the end of the movie, dancing in the snow, rips me to shreds. It is the magic of a well-told gnostic fairytale that crushes me. And the unconditional love portraid by Adam Sandler's character devastates me to such an extent that i simply cannot watch the thing all the way thru, it is as if there is only longing, an impossible, desperate longing. I can only compare it to Lewis's glimpses of joy, a longing beyond the object that brought the longing in the first place. The unconditional love and acceptance of God in Jesus Messiah... this is what i long for and is what i catch a glimpse of in these movies.
So its snowing out, and it is beautiful. Buti truly have to get something done tonight, so adieu.
Anyone ever watch Blazing Saddles when the call girl sang I'm Tired? This is exactly how I am beginning to feel at the beginning of each New Year, and its getting worse. "Madison Avenue" hasn't come up with anything new or unique for years now; I'm pretty sure that if originality introduced itself and bit people in the ass, they'd fall over from the shock You doubt me? Then all I will say to you is Clerks II.
I honestly can't give anyone any lists this year because I honestly can't remember enough of anything i watched or read or listened to this year to actually compile an actual list. The only standout in my mind has been Battlestar Galactica. Damn, what an original, daring piece of work, of art, that genre breaking show has turned out to be. I liked Dead Man's Chest because it was quirky and odd and didn't kow tow to the masse's "block buster" expectations. Plus, K Knightly. There is nothing in fiction that I can recommend, because there wasn't anything that even remotely caught my eye, which is just sad as I like fiction. I liked Frank McCort's Teacher Man in the Memoir catagory. For the annual poetry selection, I'd have to recommend Jack Kerouac's Book of Haikus. My non-fiction selection would be Garry Wills's translation of Augustine's Confessions. The best new group that I heard this year was TV on the Radio, altho I thought the guys were pretty much dicks when i watched them in an interview on MTV. For best video I must bow my head in shame and name Nellie Furtato's Maneater, altho My Chemical Romance's new video was pretty good.
I know this is a pretty short list, but I can only work with the materials I have.
Every Christmas ends like this, ever since i was a little kid; Christmas Day turns out to be dull and boring. It happens because, a) I have family obligations more important than my own circumstances, and b) i have yet, even with my immediate familiy, to experience a relationship where i am loved as much as i love back.
Jack Lewis once wrote,
My happiest hours are spent with three or four old friends in old clothes tramping together and puting up in small pubs -- or else sitting up till the small hours in someone's college rooms talking nonsense, poetry, theology, metaphysics over beer, tea and pipes. There's no sound I like better than adult male laughter.
I had that for the years I was actually an undergrad at Bible College, and when I was the resident director for the boy's dorms at that same college. I have never had it back home, or when i was in any of the churches that i served. People have been discipled so poorly that for edification's sake i could never talk about the thoughts that were going thru my mind, i didn't want to be the one that caused another Christian to overload and stumble. This sounds arrogant, no? It isn't, it is actually my lament. If Evangelical Christianity is in a place were basic questions about why there is sin and suffering in the world or what is it to have a free will cannot be asked or answered, then the Church indeed is in trouble.
Two summers ago Nate, a friend of mine, and I went to the coffee house almost evry day just to talk and to argue and to hang out. Those were some good days. But i have had no consistent fellowship like this, although this blog has been a nice avenue.
There other thing I enjoy is to simply watch movies. For years and years all i've really ever wanted to do was go and watch movies during Christmas afternoon and evening. A Christmas Day movie is probably the only semi-consistent tradition my family actually came close to establishing. I can still remember my shock when my Mom decided to come with us to watch Dances with Wolves on Christmas night. But i have truly never been with a group of people or with another person that actually intentionally made it their goal for me to be able to hit the theater and have my very special day.
Don't get me wrong, i like familiy obligations. I know it is much better for me to interact and relate with my family while i have the chance. We may not talk about the stuff that really would bind me with them, but it is important to get to know them, to find out what is important to them. It is important to physically be there, even if it is a day out of your life you'll never get back. I am a better person in community, when i care about others and don't make my desire paramount over others i care about. Even bored to tears i understand that it is important, that the time isn't really wasted.
But in the quiet part of my soul, sometimes i wonder if what i am looking for will only be found beyond this life.
Meanwhile, my mother in law and brother in law came in last night for Christmas Eve. It was a good time, the wife made lasagna, the italian dish Garfield likes so much. I thought it was a little strange for Christmas Eve, but it was one of their family traditions. I go a CS Lewis daily reader (which was nice), a $25 gift card to CiniMax, and $50 on a Visa card my BIL gave me. Not a bad Christmas. The Wife and I didn't exchange gifts, and i still don't know what to think of that. We went thru a lot of money for her gig, she bought a couple of outfits and all the food and drink for the evening. I would have got her something, but she is very picky, and anything i might have bought her she probably would have taken back.
As i have already written, today was a big waste. I walked the dogs all three times, fed em, and watched lousy movies on TV. The wife took off this afternoon and "forgot the time" while she was at her friend's house. If she doesn't forget it again, i may actually get to watch a movie tonight. I am not crossing my fingers. Tomorrow i am back at work again, this week 7 AM to 3 PM. It should be very slow. I'm looking forward to getting some reading done...
I have to admit that this Christmas season kinda snuck up and surprised me. Since my Mom died at the beginning of December four years ago, I've made it back to Nebraska each year. It was not hard to get into the Christmas spirit surrounded by all my nephews and neices and the hustle and bustle of the Scottsbluff Super Walmart! But this year I am staying around, and it has been weird. It is the first time The Wife and I have celebrated the holiday together in years and years, and while the fact that we are bodes well in rebuilding our relationship, it is still kinda strange.
What will make it stranger is that her Mom and brother are coming up from CT tomorrow. The last time The Wife and I celebrated Christmas together was in CT with her Mom and brother and things were just fine. However, we were not hosting the event, and The Wife's Mother has a general tendency to freak out under the stress of cooking holiday meals. On top of all this, I have to admit that my name is Martin, and I am a Christmas Eve shopper. That's correct, i have bought no one presents or shopped for any gifts yet; i am a bad, bad man.
So it is off to the mall this afternoon. I need to get a haircut (for the little I have left on the top), get The Wife a present, and probably shop for some food while at the same time resisting temptation to watch "The Good Shepherd" at the multiplex. I love spy movies. "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind" is my favorite movie, in my number one slot of my all time top five movies, followed closely by Roxanne, Groundhog Day, The Tao of Steve, and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
Work was awesome yesterday! The kids were gone, and it was a slow F,F, G & T day: Foreign kids, Freaks, Geeks, and Townspeople. I now have three entire days off, and I'm so happy just thinking about it that I almost wet myself just now. Gotta be careful.I wrote some stuff that I hope to post either later today or tomorrow on some scrap paper, it was so slow.
The Wife locked her keys and cell phone in the car yesterday, and didn't get home till late. I was both pissed and a little worried as it was dark, raining, and the roads were full of moron BoBos in SUVs here for the holidays. I have to admit that I pretty much just melded with the couch, ate chocolate, and watched The Nightmare Before Christmas on TBS. I hate it when I am so inert that I do not do my Offices and pray. I doubt if God is amused either. When she finally made it home she was discouraged and tired, so we snuggled up on the couch , began to watch the beginning of Heat, and then went to bed.
Which wasn't a good idea. She had gone to some chiropracter who was also some Budhist ex nun or something and during the night both big toes and the thumb on her left hand went numb and began to hurt. THAT was fun.... she woke me up for that experience. Didn't get up till noon, I walked the dogs, and posted on vox. So now its time; once more into the breach, band of brothers (and sisters).... PS, any one wanna buy two dogs with mental health issues? I will not even attempt to describe what happened on our walk this morning, except to say why don't sqirrels die and decompose up in trees? Yeesh.
What sad days for American politics. Can I just rant on for awhile on how much I just truly hate ideology? It is a hatred which runs neck and neck with dispensational theology in my lexicon of contempt, so the loathing for the ideology of the Left and the Right runs very deep.
If ideology was simply an idea, I wouldn't be writing this post. No, ideology is the justification and systematic organization around an idea that makes that idea The Idea of all ideas. Once this happens the ideology becaomes the way to interpret any narrative that may come around to fit with the ideology, all in the name of what was formerly probably a pretty good idea. In other words, ideology is the foundation for both the tyrannies of both the Right and the Left.
The tyranny of the Right is of course national socialism. The Nazis are pretty good examples of this type of tyranny. What did Hitler and the boys do? They took some very cool ideas about tradition, ethnicity, and nation and turned it into something ugly. The tyranny of the left is Communism. Soviet Russia was a good example, North Korea is a good example of this form of tyranny. Lennin and Stalin took some pretty cool ideas about communal egaltalianism and turned them into a kind of surreal nightmare.
Ideologies can, like tumors, be either benign or malignant. Ideology is always a tumor, tho, whether it kills you or not. Just take a look at the many Socialist states in Europe. France has a kind of democratic socialism that has not produced the systematic slaughter of it's own citizens. It has produced an appalling inefficientcy, but how many people are worried about the dangers France poses to the rest of the world? Plus, a lot of people are amused at France's government because really, has a group of people in history more deserved the government they have than the French?
Christianity can function under any form of government. The Bible is an ancient document, and it knows no form of government other than monarchy or tribal leadership. Yet Christians flourish regardless of whether they have political freedom or not; the Christian scriptures presents the the Kingdom of God as the example of what, someday at the end, all government will look like. Christianity reaffirms authority correctly excersized to protect a nation's citizenry, and provides a rival authority when corruption of power eventually appears. Believers in Christ are ambassador from a far away country where justice rolls down like the rivers, and justice and truth kiss. The Church, in capital letters, are to be oasis' of this as a witness to the rest of the world.
Every time I turn on the TV it seems that I am provided soundbytes of one sort of ideology or another. I'd rather break out in boils and sores and rend my clothing while sitting on a gargage heap than become a Dittohead. I'd rather sell all my clothes and run naked thru poison ivy than become a Progressive. People are political animals whether they like it or not. I suppose that I will have to practice more of the politics of the Kingdom of God just to be able to ignore the ideologies that compete as some person or parties subversion as the will to power. The only one you want running things is the guy who really doesn't wanna run things. George Washington wasn't beloved because he was tall, athletic, and good looking. He was beloved the world over because he could have been king and commanding general after the American Revolution, but decided to be a farmer again instead. Jesus was God incarnate, but He washed His disciple's feet. I know where to swear my alligence too....
Think about it: what if the Church were full of grateful, humble people who were not illusioned by either man's potential or disillusioned by man's inhumanity to man? What if they cared for all people, regardless, because God cares about people? What if they really believed that love covers a multitude of sin? I think any community of faith that even comes close to postulating this would have to nail the doors of their worship service shut because of the throngs of people who are dying for what Jesus is giving thru those who are His would. Ever see what lengths the desparte are willing to go? I'm sick of the Evangelical Church being subverted by the ideologies of the Right, and the Mainline by the ideologies of the Left. What about representing what Christians truly are -- the third way?
Meanwhile, away from the rant, I am pretty close to kicking these two frigging dogs thru the goal posts of life. If they get me up one more time before 7:00 AM for a walk after I've worked till 2:00 AM, showered, loved The Wife (Woo Whooo!), and gone to bed I will seriously consider how much it would cost for a kennel. Can I subcontract this gig? Today and tomorrow are my days off, altho I spend Thursdays at the Vocational High School for my Graduate prepracticum. I wanna go to a movie tody or tomorrow night. I'm thinking Mel Gibbson's new movie or some holiday comedy just for the fun of it. I need to meld with a theater chair, a coke, a bag of pop corn with extra butter, and a reeses peanut butter cup.
I'm writing tonight watching VH1 Classics and they have mucic videos from a specific year playing for the hour. The fact that I am middle-aged is rapidly grabbing more and more of my attention! The problem is that I don't feel old mentally or physically. Yet the fact is that at eight years old I remember the news reports saying that the Beatles had broken up. All you need is love, right?
I fucking hated the '80s. The first time I heard Duran Duran and The Culture Club I knew it was pretty much time to just hunker down and try to stoically endure the idiocy. Then I heard rap for the first time, Run DMC, and pretty much figured out that as the apocalypse was upon us, there would be hunkering down only in a fallout shelter deep inside a mountain. It wasn't until I heard "Smells Like Teen Spirit" that I knew it was safe to come out again...
I graduated High School in Bayard Nebraska in May of 82. That September I went to a JuCo in Sterling, Colorado.The only thing that stands out there was that my room mate was black and he was the first black guy I'd ever actually seen in person. Also, walking over passed out kids on a friday nigh to get to my dorm room was new. 1983 I pretty much spent working at the local sugar factory while drowning in a sea of porn -- which contrary to what you might hope, wasn't really all that healthy. Lucky for me my very religious 1st cousin was going to an Assembly of God Bible college in North Dakota at the time and informed the basketball coach that I came from a long line of Pentecostals, that I was tall, and that I had played B-ball in High School. I attended Trinity from 84-88, which was one of the most surreal four years of my young existence, changing from the guy who came to play ball and chase cheerleaders into someone who wanted to be a minister. I loved playing basketball at Trinity, and making the friends I met there. I dated seriously for the first time in my life at Trinity, quickly finding out to NEVER answer in the affirmative the girlfriend's question asking, "Was it Me?"
After I graduated I took the position as a youth minister for an AG church in Rock Springs, Wyoming. The dickhead pastor hired me because the wealthiest couple in his church had two boys that were as spiritual as door knobs and loved sports; I was hired specifically to convince tweedle dum and tweedle dee to be nice guys and go to church for their parent's sake. The only thing that really happened was they turned me on to Van Halen and King's X for the Summer. I lasted to 89, until I told the pastor and parents of the schmuk brothers that these kids were pretty much taking up oxygen in the pews that other kids, who were actually searching spiritually in the church, could be breathing. Oh, and I also pretty much punctured the illusions of granduer that the church secretary's daughter brought home with her after a visit from being a nanny for a wealthy couple in NYC. It is a truism that I learned the hard way: even if its justified, never ever piss off and alienate the church secretary.
The only decent thing to come out of the whole experience was that I met my best friend, "Macho Mike," at Trinity while playing ball. He was best man at my wedding, and to this day we speak to each other almostr every week. He has a wife and two kids and lives a life that places him in my top five of "people I admire and respect" list.
The '80s sucked all the way along -- even the movies sucked. About the only movies I could stand in the entire decade were Ghost Busters, Aliens, Farris Bueller's Day Off, and Beverly Hills Cop. Really, is there anyone out there that has more than two movies from the cultural wasteland that was 80s America that tops their most influential movie list? Sigh.
'Course, lessons learned in the wilderness and in overcoming obstacles are lessons that most form character. I went from being a kid to being a man during this time, from an eighteen year old away from home for the first time to an adult with an actual job. If you want to call youth pastoring a job, that is. There were good times, there just wasn't anything much to listen to, watch, or read.... I received an outline from my education that I have spent the last twenty years filling in on my own, and I developed a perseverance to heart ache and suffering that stood me in good staed during the 90s. It showed me that everything eventually comes to an end -- even glam rock.
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